I didn't actually need the batteries...

So I had an amazing experience today.
The sort of experience you read about in books or hear a general authority tell.
and I can call it my experience.

So here is how it starts.



My statistics class requires an iclicker for all the in class quizzes and such. I already had one, but I had to register it again online. When I got home, I saw that it was out of batteries. "Flip!" Now I had to remember to buy some Double A batteries after my D&C class the next day (which is quite difficult.... so many things to remember....).

So I go to class and when I leave, I make sure I leave through the other exit so I can head towards the Bookstore. I am just walking, minding my own business while trying to navigate the overpacked hallway, when I hear someone say "Emily?" I turn to see my friend who I haven't seen in a year. It feels weird to say that, but really I think it has been a year since I have seen her face to face.....

Anyway, we step off to the side to avoid the massive migration of people. We hug, we laugh, and we just talk. It was so wonderful. She started asking me a lot about Nauvoo. It made me so happy to talk about it. None of my roommates ask me about it so I never really get to talk about it and in a way, relive the experiences I had.

While I was describing to her all the things I did, I recalled a moment when I was watching the Stage Missionaries perform and I thought of my friend. I remember thinking that it would so cool if she came and did this the next summer. So I told her of my memory. When I said it, she was very excited and happy and she wanted to know more. So we meandered over to the bookstore continuing catching up and stuff.

We stood in line to buy the batteries..... let me just comment on the RIDICULOUS pricing BYU has. 5 dollars for a package of 4 batteries. Wow, just wow! Anyway..... After I bought them, we found some seats and sat down and just talked. We talked about missionaries, old roommates, friends, boys, majors, future plans, etc. Ya know, everything girls talk about. :)

Well, when we talked about future plans, she mentioned her consideration of performing in Disney World or Sea World, but she hadn't really decided. I told her the url address to find the audition information for Nauvoo and said that auditions are due sometime in November.... I kept telling her that her future was up to her. And I shared with her something that I learned while in Nauvoo.

The Lord takes into consideration our desires, what we want for our future. If those desires are righteous and in accordance with His plan for us, then He will make a way for us to achieve it. He doesn't throw out what we want. I told her that if she wanted to perform in Walt Disney World more than anything else, and the Lord thought it was okay, then she is going to be performing there.

I have no doubts that she will make the decision that is best for her, even if it isn't Nauvoo. But my side of the experience was amazing.

After we said goodbye, I called my mom for the day and told her of this experience. While I was telling her what happened, I got the chills, and I was outside in the heat. It was the "Whoa" chills sensation. You probably have no idea what that is, but it felt so good. I stopped and told my mom that I had the chills just by telling her the story.

When I made it home, I opened my batteries and tried to put them in only to find out that it required Triple A batteries, which I already had.

The Lord works in mysterious ways. No doubt about it.

Whatever decision she makes, it will be the one that God wants her to take. He will provide a way for her and I am confident she will do great, wherever she goes. And I can be grateful for the experience that I had that testified to me that God is grateful for my service to Him in Nauvoo and He knows that my testimony of my experience is strong.

A quote that changed my life

“Give me all of you!!! I don’t want so much of your time, so much of your talents and money, and so much of your work. I want YOU!!! ALL OF YOU!! I have not come to torment or frustrate the natural man or woman, but to KILL IT! No half measures will do. I don’t want to only prune a branch here and a branch there; rather I want the whole tree out! Hand it over to me, the whole outfit, all of your desires, all of your wants and wishes and dreams. Turn them ALL over to me, give yourself to me and I will make of you a new self---in my image. Give me yourself and in exchange I will give you Myself. My will, shall become your will. My heart, shall become your heart.” 

― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Sometimes I think we can forget that the Atonement is more than just being able to be clean again.  It can give us strength to overcome the scariest of trials. His grace is sufficient.  We can become the people He needs us to be, but only if we give Him our self. Our imperfect self. 

I have experienced this firsthand. I can't deal with everything on my own. If I do, then I will fall. 

There was a song that we played in Nauvoo called "Pennsylvania 65000". The French Horn section had this big soli part that was very difficult to master. I spent 2 hours on this section with no improvement. I felt so discouraged. I thought to myself, "I know how to play this instrument. I know what this part is supposed to sound like. Why can't I just put it together??? Why?" We went to dinner that night and when we came back for evening rehearsal I said a prayer. I told my Heavenly Father that I have done all that I can do. I feel so discouraged. Please help me. Take it from me and help me. I reread that entry in my journal. I read how that evening rehearsal was one of the best rehearsals I have had. Pennsylvania 65000 was one of my favorite songs by the time I left. 

Something as simple as not being able to play a part in a song, He took care of it.

 

NAUVOO!

So, I got an email the other day telling me that the YPM (young performing missionaries) are putting together a blog of experiences the preparation stuff.  I took FOREVER to send mine in, but I finally did and WALLAH!
check it out!

enochsband-ourstory.blogspot.com

NBD!
Gah!
I am soooo excited!

If this doesn't make you believe it, I don't know what will!

It isn't fate.  It isn't destiny.
It is just how things were meant to happen.

I was in band class.  Elder Brague came up and began discussing an opportunity we could have to serve as a performing missionary in Nauvoo, IL. I thought, "Ya know, that would be kinda cool..... Sure, why not?"

Then as the deadline approached, I thought I should probably get practicing... hahaha.... I worked with my teacher and practiced on my own.  Then I planned how I would film myself.  In my kitchen using my laptop.  I mean, I didn't have any resources to go anywhere else.... Unfortunately, my laptop wasn't working and I was freaking out.  So my lovely roommate suggested I use a camera.... (wow em, seriously? haha) She spent about an hour to film me, I will always be eternally grateful. After several takes, I thought, I guess that is the best I can do.......

I mailed it in and prayed it would get there in time, and it did! Then I waited..... and waited..... not knowing and honestly, I wasn't too worried.  I wanted to know, but I wasn't at the point where I would die if I wasn't finalist, that sort of thing....

Then I got the email saying I was a finalist and my interest significantly rose...  I thought, "I filmed myself in my kitchen and they still want to hear me??" haha I was in disbelief, but it made me want to really work for this call back audition which was Jan 5th.  Literally 2 days ago.

I worked for my audition.  I practiced.  I worked my mind, telling myself I could do it and these people really WANT to hear me. (I was still doubting that they had emailed the right girl....) When I went to the audition, I was sitting waiting to go warmup, thinking I had a good 30 min, but nope.  5 min passed and I was asked to warm up for the audition.  I was like, OK.  I bent over to pull up my tights and of course I rip a huge run and a hole in them.....

I said, this is a sign bad luck, isn't it????  People laughed thinking I was being funny, but I was SERIOUS!

I warmed up and felt good.  When I went into the audition the people there were these cute little old men.  I talked with them and they were so NICE!  It made me very comfortable, but my audition itself.... eh. I have done better.

Then they had a luncheon for all the auditioners...  That is what changed my whole perspective.  They had past missionaries come and bear the testimonies.  I remember one girl said, "ya know, you are here for a reason.  Whether it be to meet certain people, or be invited into the program or at least have the experience of auditioning. But you are here for a reason."

They sang songs and I felt the spirit so strong.  I knew without a doubt this was something I WANTED! No longer an opportunity, but something I really wanted.

That night was spent saying a lot of prayers.  I realized something as well.
God doesn't plan out our entire life.  "Oh that girl was meant to drink that soda." No.  Those are our choices.  But after we have made choices and tried and made efforts, then He exercises His power in our life.

I made the choice to take the information paper and learn about this program.
I made the choice to film myself for the audition DVD. (and i didn't give up when my laptop didn't work out)
I made the choice (with the help of my sis and bro in law) to go to SLC and do the call back audition.
I made the choice to practice.
I made the choice to say my prayers and ask for help.
I made the choice to accept whatever the outcome would be.

Then. And only then did God put forth His hand and allowed for this opportunity to come to me.

Everything happens for a reason.

If you don't believe it, then re-read my story.
I auditioned in a college kitchen.  Bad video quality and I wasn't perfect.  I didn't practice much before the SLC audition.  My call back audition was not great..... But I still tried. I still put forth my best effort.

How did I get invited to be a part of this program if I wasn't perfect?
I don't know.... my mind works on the idea that "if you are meant to do something, to meet someone, etc. you will meet them, but only based on the choices you make."

I am so grateful for this chance to go to Nauvoo.  I know it can change my life, only if I let it and I work my BUTT off!

I also expect to see all of you in Nauvoo this summer! :)