Day 4

I didn't grow up in poverty, nor did I lead a life of luxury and money. Instead, I lived a life where practical financial decisions were made. My parents didn't splurge on trivial items that wouldn't last. Instead, the money was spent on family things, like going out to eat or going to the movies.

I remember sometimes asking my mom if I could join a sports team and her reply was to the effect that I would most likely give up and she didn't want to spend the money for me to give up.

Ya know, they say that hindsight is always 20/20. I look back and sometimes wish my mom would have let me go out for a sports team so I could understand the nature of failing and getting back up again. The 90 dollars seems so unimportant in comparison to the life lessons I could have learned.

Why is it that now, as a college student, my finances are so important to me that they affect my relationships with others?

I could say that it was because my parents said no to a lot of things that I asked for because of the money.
or
I could say that my dad told me to start saving for college at a young age. (I worked in the cafeteria in middle school and earned about 20 dollars a month- that was the start)
or
I could say that I realize that money is pertinent to living in this society.

Don't you agree?

Even if you want to go anywhere, the gas prices alone could make you bankrupt.

My brother calls me stingy.
My parents say I worry too much.
My sister thinks my education is more important.

They are all right.
But I have reason to.

I don't have any scholarships. I don't work full time. I live in a cheap housing facility and yet my bank account reads lower than my IQ. I have considered on several occasion, getting a second job, but most of the time that would require a car, which I cannot afford AT ALL.

To live is expensive.


If life were but a dream
maybe it would all seem
to go my way 
and I may never dismay

To worry is to die
for time just passes by
with my mind racing
and my body pacing

I don't want to live
where all I have to give 
is everything temporal
when I need everything spiritual

Facing the world
with my hair fancy and curled
I say, 
Okay

I will give
I will take
I will share
I will make

For what I need to do
The Lord will help me too.


Today I am grateful for my job. It has been the best thing I could have ever asked for this past year and a half. It's not the wonderful career that I am going to put on my resume, but it has taught me about life and putting aside my natural man.